Sunday, March 8, 2009

Checked Swing.

I've recently concluded that men's magazines (Details, Esquire, Stuff, Maxim..and more) are much more thought-provoking and interesting than women's. They have unique, relevant, time-sensitive stories unlike the overabundance of women's magazines that will ubiquitously have some variation of the age old question "If my boyfriend ejaculated in the hot tub, can I get pregnant?" Or "My boyfriend's parents walked in on us having sex...". Ladies--It's called archives. Move on. Read the same question from last month or the month before to get your answer. Stop filling up pages and using ink with the same mind numbing questions that only make us feel dumber for buying the magazine.

You should demand innovative pieces with your hard-earned subscription money-especially in today's sinking economy. That was an extremely long segue into a small blurb I read in this month's Esquire (pg. 45)..

CHECKED SWING n: 1. On the baseball field, when a batter stops a swing just before the ball reaches home plate (as shown in the above picture). 2. In a bar, when a patron stops the act of flirting with someone after it becomes clear that he or she is not interested in engaging in "the Lifestyle".

I sweat this ridiculously accurate and appropriate vocab word. Growing up playing softball I long ago learned the baseball-related definition (#1). How many times have you been in a bar talking to a guy you think is H.O.T. but find out he's not interested or worse..a H.O.T.ter guy walks in. You'd hate to use a strike on an unworthy guy. If you keep talking to guy #1, you're striking yourself out by not going after the one you want. So ladies...just a piece of advice..before you go up to bat with a guy at a bar, do your scouting report. Don't overcommit talking to a guy in a bar because once you reach a certain point, it's considered a faux-pas to leave and talk to another guy.

In baseball you only get 3 strikes, co-ed softball you only get 2, and well's still undetermined how many strikes you'll get. So use them wisely. And start reading men's magazines or check back here often for the interesting pieces I get from them.